Errr...

First of all, sorry for the delay. I have had some computer issues and well, Lindsay, her computer is just dead.

I just wanted to let you in on two little stories that have happened to me in the past couple of days.

Story 1: I got on my scale and instead of telling me my weight, it just said Err. I know that this means error and that I needed to step on again, but seriously, Err was just perfect. It was like my scale was telling me Errr...you really want to know?

Story 2: I had to go to Saks Fifth Avenue to return a disastrous dress I bought for an upcoming wedding shower. If there is one thing I hate, it's going to high end stores in Beverly Hills. Fat and Beverly Hills just don't mix. I slipped into the shoe department because I'm a fat girl and nothing makes me feel almost normal than buying a pair of shoes that even a skinny girl could wear. There, I found an amazing pair of Tory Burch sandals for $100. I bought them. And, as I was getting my credit card back from the sales man my wallet dropped. I picked it up and was on my way. Two seconds later the sales man caught me and told me that I had dropped something. It was one of those buy 9 get the 1oth for free cards...TO SOME HORRIBLE SANDWICH PLACE! He looked at me like a fatty. Basically because maybe I was punched up to 7 sandwiches. For shame!

Best Diet Ever!?

I just recently had a bout with what I could say has to be the sickest case of stomach flu that I have ever had. It came out both ends, it kept me up all night, it was sad. But, I lost 7lbs.

You heard me right, 7lbs.

Get sick, vomit, lose weight. But, when I was hovering over my toilet I came the realization that I never want to feel that way in my life again, and that the weight I was losing wasn't worth the pain and suffering.

I also became afraid of food. I am right now feeling much better but am still afraid to eat. BRAT (Bananas, Rice, Applesauce, Toast) diet or not, I'm scared.

How long will this skinniness continue?

Probably until dinner.

Wowzers

I did something that we've here on Fatty Mcblog have been pondering and also making fun of for years. I bought something from the maternity department.

Is this ok? I don't know. It fits, so that's a good thing.

But seriously, I bought something from the maternity department at Target. The only thing I can really see in the difference is that it says maternity on the tag, which of course I have quickly removed. Nothing would be worse than sitting down, taking off your cardigan and having your skinny friends see that you are, in fact, wearing a sweater meant for a 9 month pregnant woman.

Has anyone else ever done this? And, is this the last of me doing this?

It makes perfect sense to do so...Maybe the teams of maternity and fat should join forces.

And as a PS. I really want the jeans with the band.