Big Girl (You Are Beautiful)

We are trying to get back into writing blog posts more often...it will happen!!! But in the meantime, here is a video/song that both Emily and I have had in our heads for a few days. I love Mika in general (probably because he reminds me of Freddie Mercury), but when I heard that he had a song about fat girls I knew it was true love! Have a listen and enjoy!

Saucey

Lindsey and I are huge fans of the restaurant Gyu-Kaku. If you haven't been, run to your nearest one. Gyu is a Japanese BBQ place, the kind where you have a grill at your table and cook your own food. Yummy.

Two things that Gyu has that drive both of us craving more? The salad dressing and this one dipping sauce. I'm not exactly sure what the dipping sauce is called. The website refers to it as their Sweet and Spicy sauce, but I just called it the world's best sauce...and that's saying a lot. The salad dressing is also tops, it's a miso mustard dressing. So delicious.

Lindsey and I went to Gyu on Saturday night, the problem was we didn't want to eat there. In retrospect, this was a really dumb idea, (Lindsey still defends it by the way). You have to eat there because, duh, you have to cook your food there, but we weren't really digging that. Our decision was to cook the food quickly, pack it to go and leave. I can't explain to you why we were so adamant about doing this, but we were.

So, we made it to Gyu at 5:30 at night. We had to wait about a half hour to get seated. We stood outside of the restaurant waiting for a table when I reached into my purse, took a bottled Diet Coke I had from earlier in the day and started drinking it. This was when Lindsey let me know that I better drink the whole thing up really quickly, because she was going to be needing it in a few moments. For what?

Smuggling sauce.

She wanted to put their delicious sauce in the Diet Coke bottle so she could have the sauce at home for future cravings.

When we were seated, Lindsey got up with my Coke bottle, went to the ladies room, washed the bottle out and came back to the table. It was on!

This was not the easiest task in the world, considering the waitress was totally creeped out by us and was keeping close watch. We kept asking for more salad dressing. We kept cooking our food and setting it aside. We kept asking for refills of the sauce even though we weren't eating and finally, it's basically impossible to go through one of their jars in one meal.

This whole process took about 2 hours...we should have just eaten there.

I'm proud to say we got out of there without anyone asking us about it. I know this doesn't mean they didn't know, but it makes us feel better. And I think the worst part about it is that I was so overcome with jealously that Lindsey got to have that sauce at home that I am now forcing her to go back so we can smuggle more sauce.

Sadly, this trend is just beginning...because we're sauce whores.

Hello???

Hello?

We haven't written anything in quite a long time, and we were wondering if there are people out there in cyberland who still check into this blog. Let us know if you are out there and if you are still interested in reading about the fat life. To answer some oddball rumors that have come to our attention during our sabbatical: We are still alive. We are real people. We are both women in our 20's. We are not a fraternity hoax. And most importantly, we are still really really fat.

And by the way, we just have to send a shout out to gmail because when we sent this post to one another via gmail, the sponsored ad was: Are you fat? Take the Fat Quiz!

Happy V Day: I am retarded.

I find that I compartmentalize my friendships and relationships into to very broad categories: 1. Those in which fatness may be discussed and 2. Those in which fat is a taboo subject.

Today I crossed that very important line in a moment of utter stupidity.

While taking a break from studying I found a Craigslist ad from a man who wanted to have sex with a fat girl with a big belly. The guy who wrote the ad said he worked out 4 times a week.

I attempted to email Emily and ask her why a man who worked out 4 times a week wanted to fuck a fatty with a big belly. I then included a link to the ad.

And then I pressed send.

And then I realized to my horror that I didn't send the email to Emily. I send it to my uptight, East Coast, Republican, NON fat discussing friend, James.

And then I felt like puking. Because I enjoy my cubby holes.

I am obviously fat. Everyone who looks at me knows that. But I like choosing with whom I discuss fat topics. And I do not like when that line is crossed.

So now James has an email waiting in his inbox where it seems like I ask him to write to some random guy off CL and ask him why he likes fat girls if he is a gym bunny.

This sucks.

Am I The Only One...

I don't think I am the only one, but I often wonder if I am the only person who does this. You know when the news talks about fat people and puts up random shots of fat people walking? You know how they either do front shots with the head of the person cut off or a shot from the back? And, mostly, they are frumpy and, in my opinion, don't really show the fat demographic. At least I hope not.

It is such a fear of mine to recognize my pannus on the evening news. I know it will probably never happen and these are just stock footage from 1987, but I can't help but examine these people to see if they are me, or someone I know.

Who are these people? Do they know that they are on the news? Have they seen themselves?

I think this is going to be a mystery for a long time coming, but I will forever be on the lookout for myself on the news...I just can't help it.

Expense Reports: Bring 'Em On!

Part of my job consists of me doing expense reports for various people, including myself. Example, when someone goes out of town, they will give me all of their receipts and I will create a report so they can get their money back from the company. It's a very small part of my job, but I must admit, it's my favorite.

Call it creepy, but I love lists. I love year books. I love directories. I love things that feed my little voyeuristic ways of seeing into someones life. And, what better way to see into someones life than to see what they eat!?

Because the company gives you a per diem of what you can spend each day, people, I'm thinking, usually eat more than they would if they were just at home. But, this way, you can see what people would really eat if money and everyday life didn't get in the way. It's great.

Take Lena for example. She just got back from a trip to Chicago. She had McDonald's at the LAX airport. She obviously likes to booze it up a little bit and doesn't shy away from meat entrees. She also likes her dessert.

I didn't think much about Lena before, but I think we could get along. She happens to enjoy cheeseburgers for lunch.

One girl in my office likes to skip breakfast and lunch so she can go to a really fancy restaurant at dinner time and spend her whole per diem there. I respect this. I'm not much of a breakfast person ( a fault I would like to correct). I also could do without lunch. I love that she treats herself to a $50 dinner, where she is dining alone.

Every time Lindsey calls me at work I will let her know what so and so is eating. She thinks I'm crazy. I think I'm a little crazy too, but that's okay...unless I end up in a mental hospital, rocking back and forth quietly saying to myself that Judy likes a side of horseradish with her fries.

Ohhhh...Ahhhh...FASHION!

With all the complaining we do about not having enough clothes to cover our ample bodies, we need to take a moment out of our day and praise Igigi.

A wonderful woman named Ozlem sent Lindsey and I both two of the cutest dresses in the world and therefore I'm going to pimp her and Igigi out as if I had a feather in my hat and a cane by my side.

It's, finally, so refreshing to be able to find a dress that's:

1. Pretty (Who knew larger ladies could wear pretty clothes??)

2. Cut for a woman's body (not just a fat body)

3. Appropriate! ( I can't stress this enough. The clothes cover where they should, expose where they should and flatter where they should)

Lindsey and I each got the Alluring dress. I've never really written a fashion review before, but I must say, with a cardigan and flip flops, I look cute at work. With a wrap and some heals (which I can barely walk in) I can go out at night. I read InStyle Magazine...I know all about work to evening looks! And this, my friends, is definitely one of them.

So, go to the website. Buy something and let us know what you liked.

And here is a coupon...enjoy!

"I Feel So Degradatated"

It seems as though I have lost my Weight Watcher weight tracker booklet. Knowing that it's somewhere like a trash bin now is pretty logical, but my mind is stirring up images that leave the land of logic and put me in a horrible, paranoid state of being. Someone out there has found this and is making copies and going to plaster them around town...at work...in restaurants...at my Weight Watchers meeting.

I know that's not going to happen, but that booklet, that stupid little booklet that's really a crappy piece of folded paper with little stickers on it stating my weight is out on the loose. And I'm not okay with it.

I noticed that I lost it when I went to weigh in on Saturday...where I was the only person to take my shoes off by the way. It wasn't in my purse. It wasn't in my car. It wasn't stuck between the pages of a book I've kept in my purse for the past couple of months that I haven't opened but will.

So, here I'm sitting at my desk at work and every time someone walks up to me I'm convinced they know what I weigh. And, to those who say, "you're fat...they know you're fat...get over it..." I hear what you're saying...but I have to disagree.

So, if anyone finds my Weight Watcher booklet...tear it up. It says Emily on it and it's out on the prowl.

Blood Oranges and Fatness

I'm not an everyday talk radio listener, but I found this and I wanted to share it with all of you.

Click on the link and try to get through the talks about blood oranges, (which are delicious), and LA's best restaurant (which I looked at the menu and it doesn't look so good...but that's me). Once you get past all of this you will first listen to a doctor describe what Gastric Bypass is and then to what I thought was one of the best descriptions of being fat.

The woman, who had gastric bypass, tells her struggle with her weight and what her relationship with food was like while at her biggest. Maybe I'm the only one who feels exactly like her, or maybe not, but I wanted to share it with all of you because I've never actually heard anyone, besides on this blog, say exactly how I feel...even though she's all skinny now.

This is the link: http://www.kcrw.com/etc/programs/gf/gf070106microflora_teens_foo

Press listen and enjoy.

If you're like us...

If you find yourself loving Lifetime movies about eating disorders and whatnot, I think you will enjoy what the channel for women is premiering tonight. It's called To Be Fat Like Me and it stars some girl from some show I never watched and Caroline Rhea (who still holds a place in my heart for making a joke about how her mother told her every time she felt bad about herself or her life to just "put on a little lipstick" and then proceeds to mimic herself scribbling lipstick all over her body).

The made for tv movie is about a high school girl with a fat mother and a fat younger brother who thinks they are lazy and doesn't get why they just don't lose the weight. What's so hard about being fat she asks herself? Well, obviously she'll find out. Oh and there's also something about a scholarship and her doing some documentary. But, lets get to the point: she wears a fat suit to school to see the responses she gets living the life of a fat girl. Sort of like that movie Just One of the Guys, but it's Just One of the Fat Girls.

I often have problems with shows where someone puts on a fat suit and feels how hard it is to live as a fat person only to be able to take the fat suit off and forget everything they've learned and felt. Don't even get me started about Shallow Hal. But, I'm going to watch tonight. I sort of can't wait. And not to go too much off topic, but who can't tell that someone is wearing a fat suit? Maybe from afar...maybe...but I'm not buying that. But, it's tv and I will let it slide.

So, I thought it would be fun to let you all know about the made for tv movie and tomorrow, or even after the movie premieres, we can talk about it. Sounds like a good time to me.

Tonight, Monday, January 8th, 2007 at 9pm on Lifetime...check your local listings.

Happy New Years and 1-800-FREE-411 (All in One Night)

Lindsey and I spent New Years together on my roof. I made a new years resolution to not swear as much and well, I'm not sure what Lindsey's was. I wasn't going to make the same resolution I have for the last decade though, and we all know what that was...lose weight. I'm not going to make a resolution I know I'm just going to break within a matter of hours. So, I'm going to swear less...oh, and I'm going to drink more water. Yeah.

But, I do want to change in 2007. I know I said this, at least to myself 1994-2006, but, hey, it's always the truth. And Lindsey feels the same way I think.

So, at 12:07am on January 1, 2007 Lindsey and I used 1-800-FREE-411 to dial our local Weight Watchers to see if there was a meeting on Monday. We couldn't stop giggling. The woman at 800 Free 411 couldn't stop giggling. How many people had called her in that 7 minute period to ask for the local number to Weight Watchers? Jenny Craig? NutriSystem? (By the way, has anyone tried NutriSystem...I'm curious about it)

How many people, right after the ball dropped, spend their new years calling Weight Watchers? Were their phones flooded? I'm dying to know. I'm also a little scared to go to the meeting tonight. I'll most likely have to get there an hour early to secure a seat.

I also spent most of yesterday watching every dieting program they had on...Biggest Loser Marathon, Discovery Health Fatty Marathon, etc. (By the way, I'm still so impressed with everyone at BL. Though, I looked at Poppi's diet journal, and I think staying under 1,000 calories everyday is a little scary. I'm going to have to research that more.)

So, here's to a great year of swearing less and drinking more water and maybe, just maybe...losing a little bit of weight along the way.