Thursday, November 30, 2006

The Best Thing I Have Ever Seen

Living in Los Angeles, there is basically a mall 10 minutes from wherever you are. It's quite convenient. But, there is only one mall in particular that, I feel, basically caters to fat girls. That mall is The Fox Hills Mall. It's a little out of my way, but it's worth it. And there is little possibility of me running into people I know there, so, that's a bonus.

There is an Old Navy that has a fat girl section and there is a Lane Bryant, which is great, but they also have fat girl stores that sell, well, slutty fat girl apparel. Not exactly my style, but I have to admit how fun it is to see the girls trying things on. I personally feel like I'm exposing too much if I'm wearing a V neck t-shirt, but that's just me. (Read: Prude).

A couple of weeks ago I went there to: A. Return an online order mistake from Old Navy and B. Get dinner from this Mongolian BBQ place inside the mall. So, I was just minding my own business, waiting at my table in the food court while my meal was being prepared. Two women sat down at the table next to me with their food and started to eat. They were both bigger girls and we smiled at each other.

Then the best thing I have ever seen walked by.

A man, who couldn't be taller than 5'6 and couldn't weigh less than 350lbs walked by with a woman on his arm. She was, to put it nicely, a very large girl with a very little top on...not to mention a very little skirt just like one of the girls in those slutty fat girl stores I mentioned above. Like I said, I have no problem whatsoever with this look, it's just not for me and honestly, I think it's fun watch. They obviously were girlfriend/boyfriend and his hand was very much on her rear end.

Now, why is this the best thing I have ever seen? I'll tell you. The man had the following written on his shirt:

NO FAT CHICKS

As soon as this caught my eye my jaw hit the floor. This was hilarious. I'm so angry Lindsey wasn't there to see this with me. So, I did the next best thing. I looked at the girls next to me to see if they had seen what I had, and they did. You could tell they couldn't believe their eyes. And, this prompted one of the ladies to say to me, "Oh my God. Did you see that?", to me, a perfect stranger. Yes, lady, yes I did.

Sadly, my food order was ready and it was time for me to depart. Depart, but not forget.

28 comments:

Anonymous said...

Mcgee, that's so funny. Why would his girlfriend let him wear that?

Anonymous said...

OMG, that is fucking hysterical. I am so making my big fat boyfriend get one for when we go out together. We will be the ironic hit of Williamsburg.

annanicole said...

Yeah, maybe he is just a really hilarious guy with a wicked sense of humor coupled with a panchant for irony?
Could be.
Either that or he is a. confused, b. an asshole, or c. wears donated clothing.

Anonymous said...

I weigh well over 300 pounds and would TOTALLY wear a No Fat Chicks shirt. Sigh. Irony makes my heart go pitter-patter.

xox
Heidi

CwazyLawa said...

Ha! I love it! How great is someone with a sense of humor, right? Are you sure it wasn't Jack Black and Gwenyth Paltrow?

Erica said...

I love it!!! I'm totally getting my husband one to wear out with me. : )

Stacia said...

That's awesome. I need that shirt.

William said...

Hi

That is a nice story :)

William

buffpuff said...

That's brilliant! I'd love a No Fat Chicks tee-shirt!

Anonymous said...

I used to live near the Fox Hills Mall. It's one of the oldest L.A. enclosed shopping malls. I haven't been there in over a decade, but even then it seemed a little decrepit. At the time it was considered a black mall -- changing demographics in the neighborhood had changed the clientele. The white population had basically abondoned it for Santa Monica Place or the Westside Mall on Pico. Maybe the African American influence is responsible for the bootilicious shops there now?

Thora said...

I would totally wear a 'no fat chicks' tshirt because irony is delicious.

I wonder if the shirt wearer has a slightly taller brother that lives by me? ~wistful sigh~

Anonymous said...

Culver City REPREZENT! Fox Hills is TOTALLY a black mall. I used to live in Culver City and went there many times. It's a great, great place.

Anonymous said...

Maybe it's a case of 'love being blind.' Hahahahaha He doesn't see her as a 'fat chick.' (smile)
My daughter and I go to Fox Hills Mall occasionally. But, like you, I don't care for most of the clothing and I prefer more upscale malls.

By the way, let me know if you are interested in a new plus-size designer. She's got some very stylish
clothing. Her line is called Jahqoi.
- Yvonne

Anonymous said...

Off topic. I'm pretty much planning to concentrate on using an RSS reader from next year. Using both a browser and the RSS reader is a pain. If you guys can get a feed set up I'll be able to continue to patronize you. Otherwise, I may check in every six months or so in a browser.

Anonymous said...

Lol! Awesome. I wish my girlfriend was secure enough about her weight to let me wear something like that as a joke.

Inverarity said...

Anon 9:54:

http://fattymcblog.blogspot.com/atom.xml
http://fattymcblog.blogspot.com/rss.xml

Tim said...

I would love to wear that with my sexy fat girlfriend hand in hand. She know's I love her size and she can take a joke so it could be fun :)

Anonymous said...

Am I the only one who thinks this shirt is horrible? I'd die if my boyfriend wore this.

Anonymous said...

am I the only one who thinks this shirt is horrible? I'd die if my boyfriend wore it. Funny post though. I feel sorry for his girlfriend.

Puncher of Donkeys said...

Though it wasn't the main point of your post..."slutty clothing."

I think there's only about 1% of the female population that can pull that look off. Every time I see a girl dressed "scantily" I die a little inside.

Sure some of you'll call me an asshole or reply with, "if it makes them happy, they should be able to do it."

My reply is, "would you say the same thing if I decided jock straps...and only jock straps, are what I want to wear?"

Anonymous said...

Thanks for the RSS/Atom URLs!

Kristyl said...

fat chics in slutty clothing scare me LMAO

hahaha i would have had a VERY hard time keeping my comments to myself if i saw that! :)

great post

Anonymous said...

Honestly, I never know what to do with less-than-conventionally-beautiful women (which is all of us) in super-scanty clothing. I work around a lot of younger women who wear belly-baring shirts over rather roll-y bellies, miniskirts that show the saddlebags, and all the rest of it. I'm totally torn between "you go, girl, glad you can feel the love" and "oh, geez, do you not KNOW how it looks?" You might say it brings out my inner Puritan.

Before you ream me, I know: this is hypocrisy. I know this. I'm all for heavy women loving their bodies. What I just can't decide is whether going way, way down on clothing coverage counts as loving one's curvy body or just making a target of it for those who love it...less. I'm heavier than is ideal myself, and believe me, I stick with the forties thing--fitted and shapely, expensive and flattering, yes, but baring and revealing? Yipes! I have trouble with that, unless we're talking a bikini at the beach, where all bets are off because it's all about skin and sun and water. So I don't know how to reconcile these feelings. I don't know what to do with slutty clothes on just about anybody...let alone the jockstrap on the gentleman up above. If he really wants to wear the jockstrap, maybe he should give it a try, in the sure knowledge that some will flinch. But if you never dressed in any way that could make anybody flinch...you'd never leave the house. No one would ever leave the house. Somebody's always out there flinching. I don't feel especially virtuous when it's me.

--Cat

tara said...

Cat you arent' alone, I have those same feelings.
I see a big girl walking by with the belly shirt and short skirt and I think "good for you honey, I'm glad your proud of your big beautiful curves, go on and flaunt it...now go put on some clothes, you look like a tramp"
I guess my inner grandmother comes out.
I guess I just think it is so hard for women of any age to get the respect they deserve and this makes it harder. I think that a young woman should be able to wear anything she wants without being accosted, but I also think it reflects badly on all of us, I don't care if she is America Ferrera (ugly betty) or Paris Hilton.

peace,
Tara

Anonymous said...

I don't think Paris Hilton should even be considered a woman. She's more like a mass of walking STDs.

pudge said...

great post, i love people watching :) Cat, i agree with u, it's like yeah, u go girl for loving urself, but then it's like, whoa, too much to see, or keep it for your bf/gf u know?

i think this applies to both skinny and fat though, as puncher of donkeys said, only like 1% can pull it off.

anyhow, fun post! btw, kristyl i love you icon, so cute!!

Sam said...

I love this, fatgirls have just as much right to dress as hoochies as skinny ones do. Equal opportunity here, plus, fatgirls are much sexier when their cuves are pouring outa their clothes :)

Anonymous said...

Re the hoochie look, I really feel like showing the love for yourself isn't about showing a lot of skin or not showing a lot of skin, it's just about dressing well in clothes that fit well and flatter you. Which, of course, is that much harder to do if you're a big girl, because finding good, durable, fashionable clothes can be difficult. I mean, I appreciate Avenue and Lane Bryant, but I'd like more to choose from.