Wednesday, June 28, 2006

Counter-Coulter

I wanted to start off with, "Ann Coulter is a cunt", but that just doesn't seem right. "Anne Coulter is a psychotic manipulative bitch". Ehhh, that has no oomph. Plus, its not fair to cunts or bitches. So: Ann Coulter is what's wrong with America. Perfect.

Coulter angers me to the point where I can't keep my mouth shut, even if I'm by myself, prompting me to yell at the TV set or magazine article. I basically think everything she says and stands for is part of the faux Republican sound byte machine, and that none of it really makes sense if you think about it logically. She loves pissing people off, and the fact that I am even writing this about her would probably make her smile. Or neigh. Whatever horsey pundits to when they are pleased.

In case you are not familiar with her, some of her notable quotes are:

- "My only regret with Timothy McVeigh is he did not go to the New York Times Building."
- "It would be a much better country if women did not vote. That is simply a fact. In fact, in every presidential election since 1950 - except Goldwater in '64 - the Republican would have won, if only the men had voted."
- "Frankly, I'm not a big fan of the First Amendment."
- "God gave us the earth. We have dominion over the plants, the animals, the trees. God said, 'Earth is yours. Take it. Rape it. It's yours.'"
- "There are a lot of bad Republicans; there are no good Democrats."

Those are just a few of my favorites. And, yes, she really said them.

And it's not that I have anything at all against a strong, outspoken, controversial woman. Even if she is a staunch Republican who throws the word liberal around like it's a code word for Nazi. I just can't stand that everything she stands for and makes her money from is protected by the civil liberties she would see thrown to the wayside. How can this woman hate the First Amendment?

I detest almost everything she stands for, and yet, I had no reason to write about her on this blog until I realized she vilifies fatties along with liberals, Arabs, gays, women, and immigrants.

First, she managed to insult arguably the most well know chubby Jewish woman of the last 15 years by saying that it makes sense to liberals that, "President Clinton saved the Constitution by repeatedly ejaculating on a fat Jewish girl in the Oval Office". First of all, Clinton saved the Constitution by cigaring Monica? How did he do that? It doesn't make sense to this liberal. And what does fat or Jewish have to do with her point in that comment? Why did she even have to mention Monica's size? Does it somehow make it worse that Monica was over a size 12 when she lifted the married Presidents spirits inside the oval office? It sounds like if Monica had been a svelte shiksa, Coulter would have been less offended that the President was cheating on his wife. But Coulter just had to add that Monica was fat AND Jewish. The nerve of the President to have such bad taste: A fatty and a semite!

And then I read that Coulter thinks, "[The] backbone of the Democratic Party [is a] typical fat, implacable welfare recipient". That just perpetuates the myth that the poor are fat and lazy (and therefore democratic?). America is fat, not just liberals. And, again, I must ask what including the word Fat added to her inane comment.

I also have to add that Coulter capitalizes on her thin blond looks by wearing the miniest of skirts and posing for almost scandalous photo shoots. There are rumors on the Internet that she is bulimic or anorexic. I don't know if those rumors have any truth to them, but since I doubt anyone would listen to her or read her book if she were overweight, maybe she vilifies fatties because she knows her pathetic career would be over if she ever gained weight.

But then again as a fat, Jewish, voting, pro-choice, queer friendly, feminist, liberal, pacifist I am glad that the First Amendment protects Coulter's freedom of ridiculous speech. Because if she were put in an equine insane asylum like she deserves, who would remind me that Ann Coulter is what's wrong with America, and not fatties (or liberals).

39 comments:

Sass said...

I usually hate using the word cunt, but Coulter is everything the word cunt implies when used as an insult.

Anonymous said...

"fat, Jewish, voting, pro-choice, queer friendly, feminist, liberal, pacifist"

I like your list...HIPPY!

Anonymous said...

It also bothers me when people throw in the word fat to add weight to an insult. It doesn't surprise me at all that Ann Coulter does that. She is an awful human being.

Rachel said...

Lindsey and Em,

I love ya guys to death. But politics? Please, the country is divided enough, we don't need the fatties to argue with each other over this here.
I have considered this site fairly de-politicalized in this polarized world. Please don't spoil it.
I am fat, Catholic, voting, pro-life, queer friendly, feminist, conservative, and believe in war when neccessary (remember WWII, my grandfathers kinda still do) but generally pacifist.
Does this mean we can't all just get along?
Let's focus on what unites us, not divides.
You clearly have really very strong feelings against Coulter (whom I am not advocating for or defending), and this is your blog to say in which you like.......but, this world has enough anger in it at the moment.......where's the love girlies? (I must admit, I even feel bad for Laura sometimes........*don't everyone hit me at once*).

xxxx Rachel

finallycommenting said...

Rachel-

That's so funny that your comment is right above mine because I was about to commend them for finally writing an article that touched on politics! Well, not exactly about politics, but how pundits shouldn't use FAT as a dirty word to describe people they don't like.

Politics and fatness are my 2 favorite topics in the world to talk about, so I love that you girls wrote this!

Anne Coulter is so awful!

Mary said...

Rachel - Just wondering how Catholic and Feminist go together or how pro life and feminist go together or how queer friendly and Catholic go together? I was Catholic for over 20 years and have an uncle who is a priest and I don't understand how all those fit together.

Glad you girls don't put yourself in a box about what you write about!!!

miguel jay said...

Ann Coulter is the Madison Square Garden Neil Young explained to Jewel when she opened for him in 1996: "It's a F***ing barn; show it no respect."

jennifer said...

Rachel, fat IS political, and writing about it in any positive light is engaging in politics. And hey, Coulter brought it up first!

I've heard rumors not of E.D. but massive amounts of cocaine. Yeah, that'll help keep you skinny! My boyfriend lost 40 lbs in 2 months on the crack smokers diet!!! I much prefer him at 220 and 6'1".

PastaQueen said...

I consider Ann Coulter to be a performance artist. I doubt she even believes half the things she says, but she likes to get reactions out of people so she says crazy shit. Pay her no mind.

luckybuzz said...

Amen, sister.

Kunoichi said...

Have you read The Obesity Myth? The author knows Coulter and mentions her in his book. It's been a while since I've read it (going to have to borrow it from the library again), but he talks about her obsession with being so frighteningly thin.

mainja said...

i have often wondered how much of her schtick is truly how she feels, and how much of it truly is just schtick.

but yeah, the schtick, awful awful awful!

Regina said...

Pastaqueen, good point. I once heard Coulter say her only goal when debating a liberal is to make them foaming-at-the-mouth outraged. She might do this shit JUST for the reaction and not really believe it herself. I'm impressed that "Fatty McBlog" has made this kind of fat-related-to-politics statement. Good for you!

Anonymous said...

Ya, Coulter sounds like unreal. We don't have her in my land.

Christine said...

Ann Coulter is just another reason I'm happy I live in Canada.

I love your blog, and commend you for talking about something political.

Opposing views don't mean you can't get along. I knew there was a reason I stayed away from politics.

Laura said...

Yay Canada! Not to say that we don't have insulting, ego-overinflated bastards as well, but we CAN say we don't have Ann Coulter.

Anonymous said...

Why, I've always admired Mister Coulter. I think he's got some sound ideas.

Seriously though, good on you for pointing out the fat hatred he's spouting.

Anonymous said...

Mary-
Ya might as well just go as far to say how does Judaism and feminism go together as well. Just one factoid: as a part of the Orthodox male Jewish morning prayer they thank G-d that they were not born a woman.
Brilliant.

pepa said...

The First Amendment protects the hatred and idiocy that Ann Coulter spews while this First Amendment is increasingly being undermined and even tampered with (formerly secret eavesdroppings for example...). What a shame.

I'm not surprised that someone like Ann Coulter exists, I'm surprised that she has so many fans!

Speaking of fatty haters, I read that Salon article "Big Love" and the replies to it, wow. Then I go an read the "Bite Me" article about some celebrity chef who also happens to hate fatties, what is going on? Is it in-vogue to hate fatties???

Back to Coulter: Rumor has it that she 's actually a trans-sexual..

Dani said...

Eh I wouldn't waste your time even thinking about her. She gets paid, and knows it, to upset people. You are just feeding into it. She is exactly like Limbaugh, who doesn't believe 90% of what he says. He failed in sportscasting and needed to find a gig, and realised a good way to make money.

Want to piss off the conservatives, really? Join the JPFO, Jews for the Preservation of Firearm Ownership. http://jpfo.org Nothing scarier to conservatives than liberals owning guns and supporting the second ammendment. It's hard to take away the rights of an armed people! Did you know that Hitler was VERY pro-gun control and said things like: "The most foolish mistake we could possibly make would be to permit the conquered Eastern peoples to have arms. History teaches that all conquerors who have allowed their subject races to carry arms have prepared their own downfall by doing so."

So ignore those crazy right wingers and do something that really WILL scare them.

Heather said...

anonymous 9:51. I can't say that I blame the Orthodox Jewish for that one. There are mornings that I wake up and pray to be a man for a day (or a week, especially during that wonderful TOM).

Anonymous said...

I am going to ignore all of those comments that she made because they make me twitch, and I refuse to become one of her foaming at the mouth, pissed off liberals that she so enjoys angering...

As for the transsexual rumors though... man. Enlarge the picture & look at her hands. Dude looks like a lady!

Anonymous said...

Thanks for this post...in my opinion, the best way to combat such grievous ignorance is to shine the brightest light possible on it. You forgot my favorite (and by "favorite" I actually mean "most unbelievable and horrifying") Coulter quote ever, the one that finally made me realize what a crazy-ass bitch she really is, the one from one of her columns shortly after 9/11: "We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war." Isn't that nice?

Jenn

Anonymous said...

Thanks for this post...in my opinion, the best way to combat such grievous ignorance is to shine the brightest light possible on it. You forgot my favorite (and by "favorite" I actually mean "most unbelievable and horrifying") Coulter quote ever, the one that finally made me realize what a crazy-ass bitch she really is, the one from one of her columns shortly after 9/11: "We should invade their countries, kill their leaders and convert them to Christianity. We weren't punctilious about locating and punishing only Hitler and his top officers. We carpet-bombed German cities; we killed civilians. That's war. And this is war." Isn't that nice?

Jenn

Haystacks said...

Arguing anything with/about Ann Coulter is like arguing with the homeless schizophrenic crack whore that lives on the corner and eats his own crap, and spends it's day yelling obsenities at passers by. It will only frustrate you, and really, how important is his opinion anway?

It is easy to get mad at her, but once you accept that she is just like any crack whore, she will do anything to get a rise out of you, you just ignore her so she can't siphon any crack money from you.



No insult to whores or schizophrenics anywhere.

littlem said...

"So: Ann Coulter is what's wrong with America. Perfect."

Nail. Hammer. Bang.

Also, a writerly compliment - that's a hell of a headline. George Will would plotz.

I have to say I would quietly relish the probable crapstorm on the Right if Ann Coulter were outed as a transsexual.

Imagynne said...

I'm really tired of hearing people who classify themselves as liberals or progressives insult Coulter by claiming that she might be transsexual. For a group of people that claim to be queer-friendly, that seems awfully hypocritical to me. Thinking that it's the height of hilarity to imply that Coulter was born male is 1)tired 2)unoriginal and 3) just as bad as using 'fat', 'gay', or 'queer' as an insult. Transpeople aren't a running joke for your small-minded sense of humor.

Katharina said...

She's full of it. I say this not only because she says and allegedly supports dumb things, but because I'm pretty much positive she's faking most of it because it makes her rich. A family member of mine used to be quite politically involved, and he met Coulter before she was... well, what she is now. He says she was republican but by no means crazy, and then magically she turned into a raving psycho? Nah, it's publicity whoring. Is she pathetic? Sure. But don't get worked up about her, she's probably going home and laughing her ass off thinking how much her next book's going to sell...

pepa said...

imagynne - "if" Ann Coulter were outed as a transsexual, wouldn't Ann (and all that she stands for) be the biggest hypocrite? That backbiting possibility is what people make fun of.

I would think that someone sensitive about this subject would take issue with her extreme intolerance before taking issues with people that jokingly question the true origins of her gender...just saying...

Gute Dame Wife said...

That was an absolutely beautiful rant. Right now, I feel like the Repubicans are taking over the earth, and it terrifies me.

Kim said...

Well I have to say I agree. Ann Coulter is a cunt!

littlem said...

Thank you, Pepa, for clarifying what I apparently (judging from imagynne's comment) bungled.

It's the hypocrisy of both the pundit and the supported ideology in question that's at issue, not the sexual orientation of the pundit.

Imagynne said...

Pepa--I agree with you that littlem was focusing on the possible repercussions if Coulter were found to be transsexual, but that's not the case in the majority of comments that voice that possibility. Mostly, people throw around statements like anonymous 3:15 and 9:02, above, which clearly imply that it's insulting for a woman to be 'manly' or think that implying Coulter was born male is, in itself, insulting.

As for focusing on Coulter's message rather than other commenters--Personally, I couldn't care less about what Coulter herself says. As other people have said, I doubt very much that she believes her own message. I would much rather engage with people who claim to be 'queer-friendly' but still think that using gender variance as an insult is acceptable. The bottom line is, if people are really offended by what Coulter says, perhaps they should focus on tearing down her message, rather than resorting to ad hominem attacks which only end up reinforcing the same intolerance that she preaches.

JessiferSeabs said...

I have to pipe in here and say... not all Republicans or conservatives like, support, or agree with Ann Coulter. I, for one, think that she is an absolute raging, raving, reactionary lunatic. But I do identify myself with right-wing politics.

Anonymous said...

I like Ann Coulter,
I like that's she unafraid of telling the truth as she sees it. She's smart as hell, and I do think she's a bit of a reactionary. I don't agree with everything she says, nor everything my President says, but I am more on their side than not.
I have always been a Repubican, and always will be.
I think she was wrong to bring weight into a comment, but you know, she's an equal opportunity offender. I have THREE handicapped kids and she pissed me off one day when she called some Democrat "a retard" (one of my kids happens to be mentally retarded)...

Although, I am one of those people you would probably hate (I am relatively thin) highly eduacted moneyed, fiercely Republican, pro-LIFE, and not at all gay friendly, I read your blog because it's well-written. Even though I don't always agree with you, I commend your talent and ability.

And the only woman I can think of that I personally would call a cunt is Hillary Clinton. She should have kicked that scuz-ball husband of hers to the curb a LONG time ago. He's vile.

JessiferSeabs said...

Gotta agree with "anon" on the Hilary Clinton comment.

Gotta love a supposed "feminist" couple where the wife turns a blind eye on her husband's philandering, and he plays dumb about it.

Anonymous said...

I am a pro-choice, Christian, queer friendly, welfare-hating(I think it holds people BACK), troops-supporting, feminist working "Karate Mom" who happens to be fat, as well.

What offends me about Ann Coulter the MOST is what a huge Uncle Tom she is -- she uses the word "woman" as an INSULT. How can she not see how damaging that is? Why further an attitude that a woman is a shameful thing to be likened to!?

She irritates me with her little black dresses, too. Bitch, you were on Today show at 7:30am in a teeny cocktail dress, and you're from NEW CAANAN? Ann Coulter, as a Connecticut resident I revoke your citizenship in the name of good taste.

Melissa said...

I've always been of the firm opinion that Ann Coulter needs to be fucked hard and shit on. But that's just me...

Sarah said...

I absolutely love this blog - I've read every single entry up until this one, and I was searching for the perfect entry to comment on, and I just couldn't resist an entry with such an awesome punch line - Ann Coulter is what's wrong with America. Perfect.
As a gay woman, I just can't help but feel lucky that I'm Swedish and that Ann Coulter is thousands of miles away across the pond. I wonder how it feels to bear such hate within you? Personally, I think Ann Coulter is the devil personified, and even though I don't believe she herself believes in half the things she says, I do feel certain that she will one day have to pay for all the hate she spreads. Hitler, Stalin, Franco... they all got what they deserved in the end, and I aint the one who's gonna cry when Ann Coulter gets her share of the Doom. Great blog girls, it's made my day more than once! //Kisses