Lindsey and I have wanted, for months now, to create some sort of "fat girl dictionary". We came up with this while talking in code one day about seeing a "muffin top" talking to a "skinny fat" and how one was "making love" to her burrito.
But, last night I got a disturbing email from an ex, asking if I wanted to see him. No, I didn't and yes, I know what "wanting to see him" meant. But, when I told him I wasn't down for the casual sex he informed me he just wasn't looking for a girlfriend, (funny, because I never asked to be his girlfriend). Funny enough, this EXACT same thing happened to Lindsey a month or so ago when a guy she was casually seeing told her that he just didn't want a relationship at that point in his life.
So, this got me thinking and I've come to the conclusion that:
If a guy tells you he wants to be, um, intimate, but then says he doesn't want a girlfriend...and your fat, the "fat girl dictionary" would define his statement as such:
"I'm not looking for a relationship right now" (n.) Origins are Latin for, "I'm an asshole"
Definition: You're a cool girl, we had lots of fun together, but I can't be seen in public with you because you're fat.