On Wednesday nights I have my 3 hour psych class. I must say that this is one of the best classes I have ever taken and I'm always thrilled to go, except for last night. Our assignment was to read a chapter out of our book titled "The Fat Lady". That chapter, was, in short, not very pro fat. The therapist who wrote the book (Irvin Yalom), went on and on about how this fat lady, Betty, came into his office and how disgusted he was by her 5'2 250lb frame. He went on for pages upon pages about how gross she was. She was 27, single and made him cringe. He tells us that he hates all fat people. At one point, he asks why can't us fat women just put down the doughnuts. That he sometimes feels that he just wants to shove our face in ice cream and yell, "stop eating you fat cow." Yeah, good times...especially since the guy that was presenting this chapter in class was regulation hottie...not in my sense of the word hottie (I like my men fat), but in this society, he'd be known as a very good looking guy.
So, I got to school early so I could read this chapter before class. I usually get to school an hour early so I can sit on a bench outside and read. It was a bit misty outside, but I didn't mind. I sat on that bench and began to read, in shock at what this very well respected therapist had to say about Betty. It got to the point where I called Lindsey up just to tell her how amazing this chapter was...she was soon as captivated as I was.
I sat there for about an hour in the mist and then got up to go to class dreading that we'd have to discuss for 3 hours the plights of this fat women and the therapist that hated her. If there is one thing I don't like, it's talking about being fat with a bunch of skinnies. So, I got up and started walking to class, but I looked back to see if I had forgotten anything and what I saw was not a great prelude to class...My ass had left a HUGE dry mark on the bench.
Let's break it down...huge fat girl is reading a story about a professional hating a big fat girl and then gets up and leaves her mark as a big fat girl. AWESOME! What else could possibly happen?
Well, I'll tell you what could happen...I'm hoping that no one saw, and it wouldn't have been such a big deal if I hadn't had just:
1. Read about how horrible fat people are.
2. Made a big ass dry mark on a bench.
3. Realized my fly was undone while walking to class.
When I took my spiral bound notebook out of my bad, I noticed something lodged in the spiral part of it. What could it be????
Just a Raisinette.
Yeah, I'm fat.