Thursday, March 02, 2006

The Real Fat World

Ever since I was 10 years old, I have wanted to join the cast of MTV's The Real World. But, I can't. And, it's not even because I'm too old now (seriously, how did that happen?). The reason I could never be on The Real World is because I'm fat.

Besides Heather B. from NY and Sharon from London, can you name a fat, white girl on The Real World? Yeah, I didn't think so.

The new cast proves no different. I saw the season premiere of The Real World: Key West last night and not only do they not have fat people, but they've gone as far as to put an anorexic/bulimic girl on the show. Now, it was enjoyable to see this anorexic girl be told that he breasts were like mosquito bites and that she should gain a few pounds from her new roommates, but, for the next Real World I think it would be hilarious if they threw a couple fatties into the mix.

I'll set the scenario up for you:

This would be the story, of 7 strangers, picked to live in a house and have their lives taped, to find out what happens, when people stop being polite and start eating.

If I were producing this show I think it would be hilarious to get 3 "MTV style gorgeous hunks" and then watch them as they go to this beautiful mansion where they think the hottest girls will be their roommates only to find out that they've cast 4 fat girls. The shock and horror on these boys' face would be enough for me to rate that the best Real World in MTV's history.

The excitement in the house would never end, not with such topics as:

"Who ate my peanut butter?"
"Who broke the chair?"
"My roommates are such dirty pigs...no, literally"
"Let's skip the clubs and go to Denny's"
And finally,
"Who broke the other chair?"

Since I'm not too old for the Amazing Race, maybe Lindsey and I will try out for that. Then you guys could see that instead of completing challenges, they would show Lindsey and I in our hotel room beds, ordering room service saying we'll catch up tomorrow.

13 comments:

Melissa K said...

I just have to tell you as a not so slim girl myself I just love your blog!! I am at work looking at a room of very pretty tiny girls who I want to sit on and force feed. I needed to laugh this afternoon!!
THANK YOU

Anonymous said...

Hi There,
Just wanted to tell you I too have always wanted to be on the cast of the real world, Big Brother or something of the likes..seems like having a few not so skinny people on there might shake things up a bit..lol. But..I too, am too old (33) & being 5'5" & just having crossed the 400lb mark, I'm thinking a bit too fat as well....lol.This massive belly of mine alone would probably be bigger than most of the other cast mates. Anyway, I too, enjoy your blog..
Big Fat Hugs,
Angela

Stephanie said...

Genius! I'd pitch it!

The Fat Girl said...

When I was in treatment for an eating disorder, we used to joke about making "The Real World: [Name Of Facility Here]." It was going to be half sitcom, half reality show, with an extra half melodrama thrown in. And also long, slow scenes of skinny and fat people sitting around knitting. It was going to be fucking awesome.

~loveme~ said...

yes, Yes, YES!

GoBetty said...

Chubs - PLEASE audition for The Amazing Race. Love, Betty

EatingAin'tBad said...

Hey, now, what's with the self abuse?
"My roommates are such dirty pigs...no, literally"
You can call yourself a pig if you like. Pigs are nice and pretty and pink and soft and good natured. But dirty? You and I both know that "fat people are dirty" is just one more of those stupid stereotypes that society has. If you're messy, like me, rock on. I've got no problem with that. But I doubt you're dirty in the failure to perform basic washing functions sense.
Other than that, I totally agree with you about the Real World. As for the anorexic - umm, haven't they done that EVERY season except for the first? They loooove the eating disorders - but only if it's the thin kind. As long as you're thin and have issues with food MTV will put you on the show. If you're fat and have issues with food you don't get to live with those seven special strangers. Because, you know, fat girls don't have eating disorders. Yeah, right.
Personally, I'd love to get on the show (but i'm too old and fat too) just for the free awesome place to live. Then I'd ignore the 6 other freaks and go about my business. Those fools they get on the show have way too many issues.
Of course, that's why they're on the show....

Jackie said...

It just goes to show you that todays society is getting worse and worse with the value they put on looks and weight issues! In the early days of The Real World you had real looking people...now they just need to eat a sandwich with some chips on the side. Even the girl from the New Orleans epi's (can't think of her name at the moment...) said she lost a ton of weight after being on the show because she looked at it after and realized she was so "big". Whatever. Have at it people.

Regina said...

This post made me laugh out loud. Thanks.

Katie said...

I love this!!

Starla said...

Holy crap! When did I become too old for MTV? I just realized that the cut-off age is like 25. I'm 25!

Sarah said...

I've wanted to try out for the AR for a coupla years now but I'd lose, I'd never make it to the car at the beginning. Eveyone would run right past me as I stopped 5 steps into running to pop open a soda.

Mrs. S said...

I just came across ur blog, it's great ladiez. My comment on this post is This would be hilarious! I would sooooo watch it! LoL ... Tks for the LoL's this afternoon ... =)